This week's group was mannitol and my challenge foods were sweet potatoes and mushrooms, two VERY high value foods for me and two things that I eat all of the time. I happy danced the first time I had mushrooms this week, I'd forgotten how much I loved them! It was the same with sweet potato, there is just nothing better than a baked sweet potato with butter.
I don't know guys, I'm starting to feel like a broken record here and am really kind of down in the dumps. I didn't have any kind of bad reaction like stomach pains or gas, but I feel like my digestive system just simply stalled. It's already slow, this much is clear after however many months, so piling onto that sucks. It's miserable to eat 1600 to 1900 calories worth of food a day and barely have any output. I just start freaking out and wondering what state my intestines are in when that happens.
I'm kind of ready to throw my hands up in the air and say fuck it to the rest of the challenges. I just feel like they aren't going very well. I went into this thinking that there was no way that every single group affected me, but apparently every single group affects me. I just kind of have a bad attitude about it, which I shouldn't because anxiety and that kind of stuff does affect the digestive system. It's just very hard to not be discouraged. I am going to dutifully test out the rest of the groups, simply because I've come this far and might as well see it through. Once testing is done, I'm going to have to figure some things out.
At this point I don't know what to think. Is it simply that I need longer challenge periods to see if my digestive system will level out? Three days of eating challenge foods just seems like it's not very long for my body to adjust, but I'm just following what my guidebook tells me to do. I mean I'm not a doctor and the people at Monash University are a billion times smarter than me, I figure they know what they're doing! Is it just that I will have to strictly eat low FODMAP for the rest of my life and barely touch anything in the "no" categories? That seems insane. Besides the fact I'll be missing out on nutrients in a lot of foods, low FODMAP is an absolute nightmare when it comes to traveling or eating out. I mean I can't live the rest of my life being incredibly stressed out and panicky over the thought of eating out, which is kind of how things are now. I'm going to Minneapolis in June and Los Angeles in July, I can't be in a state of anxiety about food unknowns, that's ridiculous. I want to have a good time and relax, and I don't really know how to reconcile the two. I'm just going to have to do my best I guess.
The one thing that scares me the most is wondering if the FODMAP results were short lived. One of the many things I tried awhile back pre-FODMAP was taking a magnesium supplement and that immediately fixed my issues...for about a month. I keep wondering if the FODMAP success is temporary and even if I went back to strictly eating that way, is it going to help me long term? It's just a lot to think through I guess. I'm just kind of scared and discouraged.
I guess to end on a positive note, I'm eating better than I've ever eaten in my life. I have always scoffed at the whole "clean eating" thing but basically that's kind of how I'm forced to eat now. I feel really, really good physically and now that I'm eating in a more balanced way, I don't really get hungry except for right before mealtimes. I guess there are worse things than eating this way, I just really would like some more variety. Anyways.